Wings of Obsidian
by Midnight Crew
Summary: Another story, another study, another review. A story with illogical love, adultery, Code-Breaking, motherhood, and Spades hosting a Drinking Game. This is Obsidianwings Quest
1. Welcome to Cat Hell

"Alright, alright, so this wasn't the commentary that we were originally going to post, and you probably weren't expecting Obsidianwings Quest, but hey," Spades began, sitting in her usual chair sipping her usual mug of hot cocoa, why was she drinking hot chocolate in the middle of summer? Who knows. "It's still a commentary, so it's still all good, right?"

From the name of the review, _Wings Of Obsidian_ , and the short description written under it which listed all the needed information, it was obvious what the story and the fandom was. Which explained why there was no MC with her, Spades always did Warrior reviews on her own, because she was a Strong Independent Woman. It was also her territory and if MC tried to encroach upon it, she'd bite his head off.

A pause, a sip.

"Anyways, so I was on my computer at two in in the morning, because sleep is for the weak, and ran across this little lovely fic here. One very sleep deprived brain thought it was a _brilliant_ idea to review it, so, naturally, I called M.C and asked him for the Go-Ahead to post a new commentary."

Another pause, another sip. A grin splitting across a face.

"He was pretty pissed, I mean it was two in the morning and he's _already_ crabby when he's awake. But he said I can do it," she said, smiling and laughing, though it was a bit to much smiling and laughing compared to normal, an effect from being so gosh darn tired perhaps. "So here we are, almost three in the morning, doing a review."

Well, it being so late at night slash early in the morning would explain why there wasn't _anyone_ in the audience seats. Spades had truly and completely lost it.

"Before we star, I have an idea! We're adding a drinking game to this story, from the first chapter to the last!" She pulls out a bottle of vodka from under the table and gives it a light shake, a devious smile upon her fast, "Here's how to play."

With that, the screen flashed until a list appeared on it, every rule to the game was written out in the sloppy writing that could only belong to the lovable Spades who had taken a pool stick from Enkindlers only knew where and pointed at each and every line on it. "Now, make sure you read it and understand each rule, cause I sure as Hell am going to forget by the next chapter, so you guys best remember."

-One drink for every cat with an un-Warriors name, you decide what qualifies as that,

-One drink for every time our protagonist does something Mary Sue ish or is described in a Mary Sue-ish way,

-A drink whenever a cat falls in love with her or she falls in love with another cat.

-A drink for every mate she gets.

-If a cat from the series is out of character, take a drink.

-If a cat from the series is unnaturally weak and easily killed, take a drink.

-When the cats break the Warrior Code, take a sip.

-When the cats do something that cats can't or don't do, take a sip.

-For inaccurately short time passages for training or pregnancy, take a sip.

-Spot a running trait among troll fics not listed above; take a sip.

"I could be add 'take a drink for every spelling error', but you'll be passed out before this chapter is over then," Spades laughed, shaking her head, "Besides, with what we've got, by the time this is over, you'll be to smashed to remember what color the sky is!"

* * *

 **Well, at least it isn't giving us a full page of Allegiances like many do, Thank the Enkindlers for that.**

 _PART 1 LOVE AT FIRST SITE_

 **I wonder what is happening in this chapter. Prepare for the drinking to start!**

Obsidianpaw wook up to a lot of birds.

 **Are the birds just circled around her, ready to eat her like a flock of vultures? Or are they just screeching in the air above because they're pissed at her for existing? Or is she for some reason in a nest? Tell us, Author, tell us!**

She walked outside th e apps den and saw firestar.

 **Oh, Enkindlers no, you're not making your own clans for this?**

 **PREPARE FOR HELLA OOC CHARACTERS!**

She felt her hart fluter. He was old but she thot he was hot.

 **Why can't they just let him be with Sandstorm!? Seriously, what do they have against Sandstorm? She was like my favorite cat!**

"hi" she said and smiled at him.

"hey' firestar replied with a wink.

 **Oh Enkindlers...here we go.**

He winked! He loved her!

 ***Takes a sip of Vodka***

 **But** _ **how**_ **does a wink equal 'I love you'?! Is that some secret language?! If so then MC best step up his game!**

"meat me in mah den" he said

 ***Deep breath***

 **Because its so late, I don't have the energy to make a slap at that, or even say it in a deep and very stupid voice.**

"but I have training" obsidian paw said

 **Oh, an apprentice Mary Sue who** _ **cares**_ **about her training? The world is ending! Hide your children and wives! Chaos will spread!**

"idc" firestar said

 **And he is a terrible leader in this, wow.**

 **Then again, what's new?**

obsidianpaw was excited. Why did he want too see her in his den?

 **To kill you, that's why.**

(shuld i continue pls review bye)

 **Well, I say don't, but you already finished so my opinion doesn't matter much.**

 _PART 2 HE LOVES ME_

 **HE LOVES ME NOT.**

Obsidianpaw eagley followed firestar to his den. When they were there he padded close too her and she got nervous.

 **Then he killed her, the end. Time for bed.**

He suddenly kissed her and she gasped.

 **And a drink, since cats, as far as I know, don't kiss.**

"firestar no you have a mate

 **Yes! Sandstorm! He's mates with Sandstorm!**

you cant make me have ur kits" she said

 **Woah, woah, woah!** **Slow down there girl! No one said anything about** _ **kits**_ **! You're an** _ **apprentice**_ **!**

 **But, you're also right, he can't make you have his kits, he can't make you do anything you don't want to.**

"I love u more then sandstorm! Be my mate! Idc if I am am a lut older then u!" he said

 **...Well, at least he isn't her grandfather?**

obsidinpaw pawsed. He was so hot.

 **Because being hot is a totally good reason to commit adultery!**

 **That's like me being with a super hot guy, and deciding it's totally alright to make out with him despite the fact that I'm dating MC because, guess what,** _ **he's hot**_ **! That make's everything okay!**

"ok." She memured.

 **Not okay.**

Firestar kissed her agin and she kissed him bak. He pured and licked her chin.

 **So, is the entire fic going to be like this, just them making out? Because your chapters are so small I have to do multiple ones in each review.**

(will continu if I get 1 nice review thankz)

 **And, it was probably anonymous and made by yourself.**

 _PART 3 OH NO!_

 **A Marina and Diamonds song is now in mind.**

firestar kissed obsidianpaw four a while. Suddenly he pressed against her.

 **...Don't tell me I have to bump the rating up to M? MC was the one who got the shame of reviewing a fic with sex in it, I don't want to share that shame. It'll be even worse since they're cats!**

He purred ludly and twinned his tail with hers. Obsidian pured in plesure.

 **Please no...**

He stated to get closer. Sudenly a cat came in. It was ...sandstorm!

 **THANK YOU SANDSTORM FOR SAVING THE DAY!**

Obsidianpaw blushd a lot and shrenk back. Firestar growlrd. "I love her not you!"

 **Why is Firestar such a jerk in this?!**

"but-but shes an dumb app!" sandstorm yelled.

 **Well, she's an app I'm not putting on my phone, that's for sure!**

"I LOVE HER!" firestar screamed.

 **No, you don't, you love Sandstorm!**

"u only think she is sexy!"

 **How is a cat 'sexy'?**

"Well she is." firestar said, licking his lips as he gazed at obsidianpaws light blue pelt. Her ears were tipped purplish-black

 ***In Lunarmoon voice* ITS DARK PURPLE ALMOST BLACK! GET IT RIGHT!**

and her atractive eyes were forst green.

 **Thank god they aren't rainbow or pink.**

Sandstorm cried, she cried so hard obsidianpaw felt bad. "Firestar i-"

 **Oh is she going to let Firestar go back to Sandstorm?**

"Sh" firestar cut her off. He began to make out with her in front of sandstorm.

 **Okay that is rude! Also, drink since they are making out. Again.**

Sandstorm sobbed. Firestar grinned wider and wider as sandstorm got more upset.

 **Firestar why you such a jerk!?**

He purred and so did she. Sandstorm wailed.

 **Sandstorm, get out of there! You deserve better then this Firestar!**

"Why does she hav too be so hot!" Sandstorm wailed.

 **Well, she's not hot.**

Then she came close to obsidian and licked her afectionately

 **...okay...? I guess...take a sip!**

 ***Gulp of vodka***

 **Sandstorm, dafuq? You're in love with her?**

while firestar was still kissing her. Obsidianpaw growled. Gross! She thought.

 **Oh, don't tell me this will be 'anti-Homosexuality' too. We got enough of that in Starkit! And Mission from God! And Attack on Titan High School!**

Sandstrom tired to come closer but firestar broke away and chased her away "SHES MAH MATE!" He yowled.

 **Poor Sandstorm.**

Sandstorm ran away. Firestar turned to obsidian and purred ludly. Lets continu.

 **Lets not.**

"u uh ok...ay." Obsidianpaw agreed.

 **I don't think that's actual consent. Firestar you should stop. She's an apprentice after all.**

they kissed for the rest of the nite.

 **And drink.**

(Thanks for postive reeviews :) its not really supposed to be funny tho lolz)

 **Are you** _ **suuure**_ **?**


	2. Sick and Wrong

After nearly a year, the lights to the building flickered on. Most of them were broken and would need to be replaced, the few that were not were dim as it was. Cobwebs filled the vast stage, dust filled the air and a foul odor was hard to ignore. It seemed that no one had bothered to give the stage for the reviews any TLC during the absence.

With torn up chairs, broken and dusty objects and clear signs of vandalism, it was going to take a lot of work to fix the place up.

Sitting in her usual chair, cradling a mug of hot cocoa was Spades. No longer did she have the Attack on Titan cloak, it having been replaced by a red hoodie. Other than that and a new pair of glasses, not much had changed with her. Well, there was one big change, she was no longer a high school student but a college kid, and that meant one thing; more sleep deprived reviews.

Like this one!

"Hello everyone!" Spades called out cheerily, the tired bags under her eyes the only sign of the lack of sleep she got had yet to cease over the months she was gone. She drew her knees up to her chest as she sat on the chair, "Sorry for the impromptu absence, there was a bit of personal problems that erupted between MC and I like an active volcano. We'll maybe explain it a bit more in our next duo-commentary, but to keep it short; we fought and now we're friends again and working on these again."

She gave an apologetic smile, scratching at the back of her head with her freehand.

"I'm really sorry about the hiatus, but it's hard to work on things together or be on here at all when we're both really angry at the other. You know? Besides, college stuff also got in the way a little."

Grinning yet again, Spades jumped off her chair; careful not to spill any of her precious scalding hot brown liquid, she marched around the stage with it's now creaking floorboards, "But we're back again. It's some work, but we're working on reviews, and we have an obligation to give you guys our shitty commentary in an attempt to make you guys laugh and smile!"

Stopping to stare at the empty audience, because who in their right mind is coming to a stage when everything is on the point of falling apart? Spade could only smile wider, "So, without further ado, who's ready for some more of Obsidianpaws train wreck of a life? Because I know I'm not!"

The screen creaked as it came down, one half of it falling completely so that it hung lopsided, viewers would have to crane their heads to the side just to read it properly and Spades could only give a weak laugh.

"We'll... have to get a lot of this fixed," she mused, "Or just get a new place to do these at."

* * *

PART 4 LOVETRIANGLE

 **Oh boy, now if that isn't a sign.**

The next day obsidianpaw went to jayfeathers den. He looked at her with longing in his cool blue eyz.

 **It's always Firestar and Jayfeather, has anyone else ever noticed that? Whenever there is polyshipping, it always involves those two. The underage cat wants to be mates with the medicine cat and his leader grandpa.**

 **When in reality, a girl having the hots for a guy** _ **and**_ **his grandfather is kind of gross.**

He pured.

"I smell firestar on u" he said.

" **I smell my grandfather who has a mate and kits on you, you dirty whore." Is what he really said.**

"oh…uh…" obsidianpaw stammered.

 **Caught red-handed… or rather red-pawed.**

"how abot….i get my scent on you to" he sugested.

 **IT'S ALWAYS JAYFEATHER AND FIRESTAR OH MY ENKINDLERS**

 **Why can no one just let the Medicine Cat be single and not mingle?**

Obsidianpaw blushed. Befor she culd do anything he waz kissing her. He kissed her harder than firestar.

 **Aaaaand drink! Cause kissing, over the year-plus of not working on this, I still have yet to find proof that cats can engage in steamy make-out sessions.**

She enjoyed it.

 **Of course you did.**

He took it to da next level by twining there tails together. Obsidians heart raced. The blud rushed in her ears. They both pured loudly.

 **Gross.**

Obsidian left the den felling happy and satisphied.

 **I just now noticed that they no longer call her Obsidianpaw, but just plain ol' Obsidian. Is she** _ **not**_ **a clan cat anymore?**

She new she liked jayfeather more den firestar

 **You shouldn't like either of them, because Firestar has a mate and Jayfeather can't have a mate, because it's against the Warrior Code. Why does no one ever care about that rule book their supposed to follow anymore?**

…but firestar was so hot…suddenly a memery flashed in her mind. It was firestar making out wif her as a kitt.

 **OH MY ENKINDLERS FIRESTAR THAT IS SICK AND WRONG! CRADEL ROBBING AT A WHOLE NEW LEVEL SOMEONE ARREST THIS CAT RIGHT NOW!**

He had always loved her….who wuld she choose?  
 **Doesn't make the whole** _ **MAKING OUT WITH A KIT**_ **any less wrong!**  
PART 5 REGRET

 **I know that feeling. I regret reading this.**

Obsidianpaw felt pain in her belly.

 **NOPE. NOPE! ABORT MISSION! I REPEAT! ABORT!**

She immediately went too jayfeathers den…at leest it was an excuse to see him again. She still hadn't tooled firestar about them and it had ben a week!

 **Wow. You are a shitty mate. Can't even tell your mate that you ditched him for his grandson on the, what was it, same day? Same day you mated with him.**

She went to his den and acted sexy,

 **-Takes another gulp of vodka-**

 **I have yet to see a cat be 'sexy', and the day I do find a cat sexy, I want someone to throw me off a cliff.**

she culd tell it gave him pleasure. "my belly hurts." She said az she ran her tale acros his cheek. Jayfeather let ot a cole breath.

 **This just… makes me uncomfortable? I'm not sure why though?**

"ill check it out four u" he said. Obsidian ruled over on her bak. Jayfeather brushed his paw a long her belly. Befor he could start to do somthing she wuld have liked,,

 **I'm afraid to ask what that 'something' would be.**

he gasepd.

"OBSIDIANPAW U R PREGNANT!" he gasped.

 **-And cue Spades screaming in her seat-**

Obsidianpaw felt sick. "are…are…they urs or firestars."

"idk" jay said.

 **You guys are wild cats; you don't have the technology or capability to even check to see who's kits they are. Obsidianpaw, why would you even think you could tell just by feeling the belly.**

 **But, I guess either way they're going to be kin to both Jayfeather and Firestar.**

Obsidian cried on hiz shulder "i…i….hope dey r urs…but they culd be firestars….or…" obsidian gasped, remembering back to when she was first apprenticed and liked lionblzae

 **OH MY FUCKING ENKINDLERS ARE YOU KIDDING ME.**

"THEY ARE LIONBLAZES!"

 **And you just knew that they are his… because that's a natural thing to do?**

Jayfeather sobbed. "my own brother…." He cried.

 **Hey, it's better than them being your grandfathers.**

Obsidianpaw felt bad but she new they wer lionblazes.

 **I don't know if you guys knew this, but, no sarcasm here, I** _ **really**_ **love when trollfics pull this bullshit. It just brings life into my cold dead heart because it's freaking hilarious.**

She rushed to the leader s den an told firestar. Firestar gave her a gash on her face.

 **Whoa! What the Hell, Firestar? Did you seriously just attack an apprentice? A** _ **pregnant**_ **apprentice?**

"DEY SHULD HAVE BEEN MINE" he yowled.

 _ **Because attacking a pregnant child-and-or-teen-because-I-don't-know-how-old-Obsidianpaw-is is totally the right thing to do!**_

Obsidian was hurt mentally and outsidely.

 **I think you mean to say 'physically', but 'outsidely' works okay, too.**

She sobbed in the apprentice den…a cat came into comfort her. She luked up and it was…icewing?!

 **Sup, Icewing! Aren't you supposed to be in Riverclan? With your mate Mintfur?**

(2 b continued pls stop hating. Are you team firestar, jay, lion, or ice? XD)

 **Wait… Ice? As in Icewing, as in Riverclan cat who should not be in Thunderclan territory? Are you saying she's going to be a love interest too?**

 **Also, how can anyone be team Lionblaze when the poor tom has only been mentioned?**

PART 6 NO HOMO

 **All of the homo!**

Obsidanpaw felt comfortable next too icewing.

 **If I was a Thunderclan cat, and a Riverclan cat was randomly in my den, I'd be more on edge than comforted.**

She crled up against her az ice licked her afectinately.

 **I am so confused as to why Obsidianpaw is not confused.**

She kissed ice quickly and turned away.

 **Wow, she really is a dirty whore.**

Instead of being shocked icewing kissed her bak on the lips. She kissed her hard and pressed against her. Obsidian shiverd. She luved a she-cat?

 **It's not all that weird or strange, but I just get the feeling that they're going to make it seem weird and strange.**

"I cant be wif you I had an affair wif firestar, nd pregnant with lionblazes kits, nd jayfeather is my bf" obsidian said.

 **Wow, it totally sucks to be you, because it's not like you can just end all your cheating relationships and settle down in a healthy monogamous relationship, or a healthy polygamous one.**

"ill be ur mate instead of dumb jayfeather." Icewing said.

 **Jayfeather is not dumb. Well, this one is, but the real one is not.**

"ugh why does everybody luv me" obsidianpaw said.

 **Such a curse.**

Icewing ignored her and kissed her more. Obsidian didn't proteest. Suddenly jayfeather walked in. he didn't notice cuz he waz blind.

 **You would think he'd notice the** _ **Riverclan**_ **cat in the den, but no, of course not.**

He went ovr and kissed obsidian, her didn't know ice was kissing her to. Obsidian fekt awkward.

 **I would too.**

"I wil father da kitz" jayfeather said and walked away.

 **Not even going to stay and try and talk about it? Just going to tell her that you'll be the father, not give her a choice and walk away? Yeah, real father material.**

"that was close" icewing said.

 **That was bullshit, that's what that was.**

Icewing walked away. _what will I tell jayfeather? I want icewing too b the kits parent wif me not him_. Obsidian thought.

 **Here's what you do, Obsidian. You just walk into the den, sit him down and** _ **explain**_ **to him that you care about him, but it can't work because he's a Medicine Cat and it's against the Warrior Code, so you can't let him be you're mate and father of your kits.**

She cried and ran out of the camp.

 **Please don't come back. Just… get adopted by twolegs and never come back.**


	3. Spanish is Not Stupid

"Hello and welcome to another episode of _Camp Pining Hearts!"_ Spades greeted cheerily as she stood on the stage, arms stretched out, "Last time we ended on quiet the cliffhanger! Pierre up in the woods alone only to be attacked by a mountain lion! Tensions building between Percy and Paulette and not to mention the big canoe race coming up!" The girl was fanning herself now as though to show just how nerve racking this supposed previous episode had been.

Regaining her composure, she straightened up and smiled wide, "But! It's time for the final episode! Will Pierre survive his date with nature and return to Percy's waiting arms? Will Paulette and Percy finally call it quits on this infatuation they claim to hold? Will Ryan win the canoe race like he's been working so hard to do?" she asked, stepping forward in excitement, "Well! It's time to find out for this is _Camp_ -what?"

Pausing, Spades brought a hand up to an unseen earpiece, frowning as she was spoken too, "What? What'd you mean this aint _Camp Pining Hearts_?" she demanded, tapping her foot impatiently, " _Wings of Obsidian_? Never heard of it. Look! If I want this to be _Camp Pining Hearts_ , then by Enkindlers this is going to be _Camp Pining Hearts_!" she yelled, puffing her cheeks out in frustration, "Fine! Fine! We won't do cheesy camp shows and do stupid warriors reviews instead! Happy?"

Seemingly being approved, she grumbled, sitting down and pouting, "Well, I guess we'll save _Camp Pining Hearts_ for another time. Welcome to the second to last installment of _Wings of Obsidian._ Hooray," she said, twirling a finger around, "I still think it'd be more fun to do the camp show."

* * *

PART 7 QUEST

 **This is going to be a short quest.**

Obsidian felt pains in her bely. She knew the kits were comeing and she waz far from camp.

 **Jesus! How long were you out of the camp for?**

 **Is 'Ridiculously short pregnancy' on the list for the drinking game?**

She layed down and had teh kits.

 **Quickest pregnancy and quickest giving birth scene. Not even going to tell us how you had piano's and movies inside you? Starkit would be ashamed.**

They died except one.

 **No grief either I see.**

It was a dark brown tom. It looked nothing like lionbaze or her.

 **And who here is now expecting a _fourth_ tom to have had an affair with her. **

**Also, has Icewing gone back to her own clan yet?**

Weird.

 **My money is on either Brambleclaw, Hawkfrost or Tigerstar being the father of this one. Because nine out of ten one of those three have had an affair with our mary-sue cat.**

Obsidian new she couldn't go back to the clan so she stayed outside for a while. She buried he kitz like dirt, she hated them and there father.

 **Wow! What did the kit's do to deserve the hate? Terrible mother here. Also, what did Lionblaze do to deserve the hate? We haven't even seen him, just mentions.**

She stared at the living kit.

Suddenly she relized he was differebt. Hiz eyes were amber and he already had a scar on his noz. Weird.

 **How the hell does he already have a scar?**

 **Also, it's now even more likely that it's Hawkfrost or Tigerstar's kit or them reincarnated.**

She went back to camp with him and saw icewing.

 _ **Why**_ **isn't she in Riverclan yet?**

Icewing took him to the nursery. Jayfeather was shocked she kitted and still dint know she loved icewing.

 **Obsidianpaw is such a terrible mate.**

Obsidian growled at him.

 **Still a terrible mate.**

'I luv icewingnot u" she said.

 **Not even going to let him down easy. Seriously, what did Jayfeather do to you?**

 **At least he can now return to his one true love; stick.**

Jayfeather ran away crying. She dint care having kits had filed her with rage.

 **Not an excuse to be a bitch. Wait, you're a cat not a dog.**

PART 8 REBORN

 **AGAIN MY CONCERN OVER THIS KIT BEING REINCARNATED BADDIE IS BEING STRENGTHENED**

 **I DON'T LIKE THIS**

Her kit was being made an apprentice it had been 6 months since she kited.'

 **Well, at least they're telling us it's been six moons instead of making us assume the kit was apprenticed the day after birth.**

"ur name will be tigerpaw" firestar said.

 **Oh Enkindlers why.**

TIGERPAW?!

 **What? Did you not realize that naming your kit Tigerkit would mean they would be Tigerpaw when apprenticed?**

Obsidian realized something in dat moment.

 **Spades realized something in that moment; is Obsidianpaw still an apprentice, or is she just Obsidian now?**

Her kit was tigerstar reborn.

 **Called it.**

How culd she kill him b4 he was evil?

 **How about you don't? You don't know if he's really reincarnated Tigerstar, and just because he is doesn't mean he's going to become Tigerstar.**

She had started to actually luv him after he was born. She cried and ran away form the ceremony.

 **She is still a terrible cat. She's worse than Flavia.**

Icewing ran up and comforted her.

 **I'm going to assume she was kicked from Riverclan and moved into Thunderclan and it just was never brought up.**

"it will be ok I will kill him" she said

 **Why are you guys so nonchalant about killing a cat you aren't positive is a reincarnation of Tigerstar?**

 **You people are terrible parents!**

"NO!" scremed obsidian.

Ice siged "what wil we do?"

"idk" said obsidian.

 **How about let the cat live? I'm sure Starclan would warn Jayfeather if Tigerpaw was a threat.**

Her life was horrible she was only made a wario a moon ago (her name was obsidianwing btw)

 **Because that wasn't important enough to mention before, or have a scene for.**

and her kit was an apprentice. She luved like 5 cats, and her kitwaz evil. Ugh.

 **She's _still_ in love with all five?**

 **Wait... five?**

 **Firestar, Jayfeather, Lionblaze, Icewing... who's the fifth cat?**

PART 9 THE CHOICE

(took a brake cuz of hate. Pls stop flaming.)

 **I will find a flamethrower, the Midnight Crew will never stop using fire.**

obsidian had too finally chose her mate.

 **You mean she didn't just choose Icewing after saying she loved Icewing?**

She hated firestar, icewing was boring, lion left her, nd jayfeather was mean.

 **Wow, she is terrible. Also, where is this mysterious fifth cat you said you were in love with?**

She had nobody. She loved nobody. Angry filled her up. _I will kill my kit!_ She screamed in her head.

 **What did the kit do? Wow, I hate to say it but Starkit was a better mother than her. _Starkit was a better mother._**

Obsidian ran out of camp. She saw tigerpaw. She jumped on tigerpaw an tackled him.

"m-mom?" he cried weekly.

 **He cries 'mom' out once a week.**

Obsidianwing sliced his neck open and he was dead.

 _ **Why you gotta be so ru-ude?**_

His menoter berrynose gasped. "YOU ARE EXILE" he screamed.

 **Not sure if you got the authority to exile a cat there, Berrynose, but I am in total agreement with you.**

Obsidian ran away. She left all clan territory. Suddenly she was in the mountains.

 **That was a short run. Wait, fuck, now the tribe is in danger of her!**

She ran more, and hit a cat. He looked down at her, he was the hottest cat she had ever seen.

 **Because cat's can be hot?**

He had goth black fur wit ginger and brown and white patches.

 **Wow... she managed to bring Goth in here?**

His eyes were dark green. They were so beautiful they looked like they had eyeliner.

 **Is anyone else wondering how a cat knows what eyeliner is?**

His fur was long and sleek. He had bright white teeth with fangs. The last thing she noticed was his goth black coller with silver spikes and a scull hung from it. In the scull the name sol was carved.

 **That is not Sol. That is Sol's evil twin brother.**

PART 10 HOME

(woo 10 partz! Thanks too all teh nice reviewers xD! And all of u flamers are dumb and in dis fanfic all of ur OCs r exiled cuz they were dumb flamers like u. PS sol is a vamp and goth kinda bc I wanted him to be smexy I know he isn't rlly vamp)

 **She had to bring _vampires_ into this too? She had to make _Sol a gothic vampire_ for sex appeal? HE'S A CAT.**

obsidians hart beat fast. She whispered "hi sol"

 **"Hi cat I have absolutely no interest in."**

he gazed at her "hey." He said.

"i-I'm obsidianwing…" obsidianwing said. " I was exiled from thunderclan."

 **For good reason, you murderous fleabag.**

"I hate thunderclan!" sol said "I took over bloodclan so I could fight them

 **NOT BLOODCLAN NO!**

…the old leader scourge visited me in the df and made me a vampire so I could live long and kill easily."

 **One; Sol does not believe in StarClan and would not be visited by the Dark Forest cat's because of that. Two; Scourge did not believe in StarClan and would not be in the Dark Forest because of that.**

"Your so…smexy…" obsidian said, drooling. Sol snorted and pured, he rubbed against her.

"so r u" he said.

 **You seriously just met.**

Obsidian blushed and licked sols cheek. They made out for a long time. She slept beside him. She felt at home when she was wit sol.

 _ **You seriously just met**_!

PART 11 THE END! (Hai guys :3 i toke a break bc of all the mean flamerz! I looked up what a troll fic is and dis isnt a joke?

 **Are you sure?**

I m trying my best lel...plz stop flaming. :(

 **I mean absolutely no disrespect, but, I know this can only be a trollfic because I know you can do so much better. A story can only be this bad intentionally. I'm certain you're probably a really good author, because this is a good trollfic.**

Im gunna try to write better thank u 4 da nice advice in da reviewz! Anyway dis is the final part! Who do u think obsidianwing wil be with?

 **Considering she hate's Firestar, Lionblaze apparantely left her (Not that I can blame him) she found Icewing boring and I hope the poor girl went back to Riverclan to be with her own mate, and Jayfeather is mean... probably Sol. Unless that mysterious other cat comes up.**

BTW U FLAMERS R DUMB IDIOTS HAV U HEARD OF A THING CALLED A LIFE?)

 **I have one, thank you very much.**

Obsidianwing new she luved sol. She got up and stretched beside him. He fliped his scene hair and kissed her.

 **I almost forgot that cat's can kiss in this.**

"I loaf you" he meowed

 **Like a loaf of bread?**  
"I love you to" obsidianwing meowed.

Sol wrapped his tail around hers. "Lets run away from the dumb clans!" He memured.

 **You already did. You're in the mountains. Which beg's the question as to why Sol is there if he's running BloodClan now.**

"...alright" obsidianwing excited.

She would miss jayfeather and icewing and lionblaze and firestar but she had sol now. Sol had dark black fur and piercings and scene hair and had BOTDF tatooed on his shoulder…he was perfect.

 **So much is wrong with that. Just... so much.**

 **I never liked Sol, honestly, I hated him in the books so effing much. But now? Now I just feel so sorry for him.**

"Lets go" obsidianwing drawled.

Sol ran and she followed.

"Im gunna change my name" sol said flipping his hair "to sun because spanish is stupid"

 **Hey, don't dis Spanish! I wouldn't have spent three years nearly failing Spanish classes if it was stupid.**

Obsidianpaw sneakered because she agreed spanish was dumb. Finally her and sun reached a river.

 **What have you against Spanish?**

They heard paw steps behind them. It was thunderclan!

 **Why is Thunderclan after them?**

They spun, they were gonna have to fight. Firestar attack obsidianwing and she was uffended. She fought back and raked his eye. She belated his tail and bended his paw. He was too strong. He thr owed her in the river with sol.

 **I would hope he was too strong, I mean, he's been fighting for a lot longer than her.**

Sol fell to the bottom and was dead.

 **Well he didn't last long.**

"No how could firestar do that he cant die now." Obsidianwing circled. She swam to the top. SHE WAS ANGRY.

 **When are you not?**

She channeled all of her rage and her blue fur turned red, her eyes flamed. She riped open firestars throught. He died.

 **No words. Just... no word.**

Obsidianwing ran away she couldnt believe what she has done. She ran to the top of cliff.

 **JUMP JUMP JUMP!**

She put one paw under the edge and sudanly she was churning in the air.

 **... so did she jump or... I'm not sure?**

(And thats da end. If this gets good reviews i wil right moar X3)

 **PART 12**

REBIRTH

(Guess whoz back frickerz XD i got some nice commets so i continued i impruved a lot! :3 WARNING M RATED SCENE IN THIS CHAPTER)

 **Oh no. No, oh come on! I don't want to have to commentate over a sex scene!**

Obsidianwing was falling thru the air. She couldnt move but she screamed for help.

 **But no one came.**

Injectionly claws hooked her back and pulled her up. She blackes out right away.

 **How the Hell did a cat manage to catch her midair and pull her to safety?**

Obsidian woke up in...SHADOWCLAN CAMP.

 **OF COURSE.**

She whipped loudly until blackstar ran in. He was hot and had peercings on his nose and ears and probably other places he also had long dark emo hair with a red streak in it. He had muscles and was so HOT obsidian almost got a nozebleed (x3).

 **For the love of... these are _cats_. How are they getting piercings and dyed streaks in their fur? **

Blackstar sniffed and said "i saved you because you were so..." He gapped, "smexy"

 **Of fucking course.**

Obsidian smeeled and they fricked four da rest of the da night.

 **Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.**  
***

Obsidian woke up beside blackstar she could finally forget about her past when she was with him. Blackstar woke up and kissed er on the nuzzle. Obsidian retaliated.

 **What... you don't like being kissed? You are such a bipolar mate, one second you love the cat the next you want them dead.**

It was a month later and obsidian was taking a walk when she realized she was fat and tired.

 **Lay off the frogs.**

She grouped, she new this feeling. Obsidianwing was...PREGNANT WITH BLACKSTARS CHILD.

 **Enkindlers no! Why can't they just let Blackstar be with Russetfur? Is that too much to ask?**

(2 be continued X333)

 **-Spades screaming into the void-**

* * *

Shuddering and shivering with feelings of disgust and loathing, Spades could only weakly look up at the audience as she curled up in her seat. "Well... that was a rollercoaster, and not the good kind. If I ever start dating someone like Obsidianwing, please of please kill me," she begged, curling back up on herself.

It was almost over though, she reminded herself, almost over, she would be free of this soon, be free of Obsidianwing's bipolar nature and terrible mate material-ness.

"I don't know if I can survive the last few chapters," she wailed, "Why couldn't we have just done _Camp Pining Hearts?"_ As though in response, she was spoken to through her ear piece and then let out a loud hiss, " _I don't care that it doesn't actually exist!"_


End file.
